Transitioning Holiday Traditions to the Next Generation
Lisa Keer, NBC-HWC, looks at the flexibility, understanding, and patience required as family dynamics around holidays evolve over time.
Patient EducationMay | 29 | 2024
Why was Ethan Kross’ 2022 book Chatter: The Voice in Our Head, Why It Matters, and How to Harness It (Crown, 2022) a runaway best seller? What made readers gravitate to a scientific exploration of cutting-edge research in psychology and neuroscience? And why does managing chatter even matter?
Kross, a professor of psychology and director of the Emotion & Self Control Laboratory at the University of Michigan, describes chatter as that relentless stream of self-talk that shapes our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. Chatter can be especially impactful during times of change and transition.
Understanding chatter and how to harness it is a key consideration when we are working to make and sustain lifestyle changes that support our best health.
At the heart of Kross’ research is the idea of the inner monologue, that continuous dialogue that unfolds in our minds. While the inner monologue can serve as a valuable tool for problem-solving and self-reflection, it can also spiral into rumination, worry, and self-criticism. Think of a time when you experienced this type of chatter. How helpful was it?
According to Kross, the brain's default mode network (DMN) governs the inner monologue, that ebb and flow of chatter. The DMN can become overactive, hijacking our attention, and triggering what he calls the chatterbox brain. When we worry incessantly about the future or dwell on regrets from the past, it is the chatterbox brain that fosters those repetitive, draining and discouraging thought patterns.
Beyond its immediate cognitive effects, chatter exerts a profound influence on our emotional well-being and interpersonal relationships. Heightened levels of stress, poor quality sleep, anxiety, and depression are all impacts of excessive chatter. Moreover, chatter can also impair our ability to empathize with others, leading to unintended interpersonal conflicts and misunderstandings.
As part of his research, Kross tested several strategies for taming chatter including what he calls distanced self-talk. Say you're worried about meeting a crucial project deadline. This leads to excessive rumination. Using distanced self-talk, you say to yourself, "Lisa, you have colleagues to help you with this project. And you planned your schedule, so you have plenty of time." Using your own name along with the second person "you" in your inner monologue helps to put distance between yourself and the issues that trouble you. The benefit? You gain perspective and better control over your thoughts and emotions and lessen their impact.
Kross feels that social support is also critical in mitigating unproductive chatter. Excessive rumination, for example, is typically something we do in isolation. By reaching out to others, we have a potent antidote to the internalized distress unchecked chatter creates.
When we harness chatter, it can support strong interpersonal communication and relationships, and enhance performance in many areas, from athletics to public speaking. A constructive inner dialogue can repurpose chatter to optimize our focus, confidence, and resilience in high-pressure situations.
Think about the last time you worked to make a lifestyle change in support of your best health. When you found the process straightforward, what did your inner monologue sound like? Encouraging, celebratory or even gratefully surprised? And when you encountered barriers to your progress, what did your inner monologue sound like then? Discouraging, dejected or even highly self-critical? The differences between an inner monologue that supports us versus one that does not can be significant.
By understanding the mechanisms underlying chatter and implementing Kross’ proactive strategies for managing it, we can cultivate greater resilience, clarity, and well-being in our lives. Navigating chatter is a journey of self-discovery and growth, harnessing the power of our inner voice to shape a more compassionate, fulfilled existence.
Lisa Keer, NBC-HWC, looks at the flexibility, understanding, and patience required as family dynamics around holidays evolve over time.
Lisa Keer, NBC-HWC, explores the significance of building both community and social connection.
Lisa Keer, NBC-HWC, explores the anatomy of the vagus nerve, and its role and impact on your overall health.
Lisa Keer, MS, NASM-CPT, NBC-HWC explains how to use social media to support your best health and avoid the undue influence of influencers.
Lisa Keer, NBC-HWC looks at the intersection of fitness and GLP-1 agonist therapy to understand how physical activity and incorporating it into your lifestyle while taking these medications can support your best health.
The Spiritual Care Department at Massachusetts General Hospital serves the spiritual needs of the hospital community. It offers religious-specific care for those who request services, providing a priest, evangelical pastor, rabbi, or imam when needed.