Competition

Competition is an integral element of an adolescent’s development. By competing with peers and others, one is able to evaluate oneself. At times, though, competition may prove detrimental to the teen. As competition, pressure and stress often co-exist, it is crucial for parents as well as teens to be aware of the role of competition in the life of adolescents.

Academic Competition

One of the most pervasive forms of competition is that which takes place in the academic setting. This type of competition is often individual and emphasizes personal intelligence and determination. At other times, parents and teachers foster academic competition among students. And often, competition openly exists between students. For example, there are usually elections for leadership positions in student groups.

Teens respond in a variety of ways to academic competition. Some thrive on the intensity and use it as a motivating force while other youth step aside and are wary of the increasing pressure. Many students perceive more intense competitive feelings during the college application process. In honors classes, competition may become more intense, and students often compare grades and standardized test scores. Some students may become forlorn by performance they perceive to be substandard. Others may become increasingly motivated to work harder to improve their grades. Reactions to these events are entirely individual.

If parents sense that a teen is succumbing to the pressures of academic competition, it is important for them to help alleviate their student’s concerns. In the same manner, parents should not establish exceedingly high standards so that a teen may never reach them. Standards are important; however, it is also necessary for parents to be realistic and encouraging of their children and their efforts.

In addition to academics, athletic competition presents other opportunities for self-evaluation. At some schools, athletics are a required part of the high school curriculum. Others offer participation in athletics as an extracurricular activity. Athletic teams—where both communal and individual forms of competition take place—are prime arenas for the teen to be engaged in friendly and healthy competition. In team sports, teens learn the importance of working as a group to achieve results. Only when all members are working together may the team perform well. However, the efforts of the individual are noted and necessary for team success. Even in seemingly individual sports—such as track or tennis—team scores determine who wins.

At times, competition in sports becomes particularly intense. This intensity is good; however, when it becomes out of hand, it is unhealthy for the developing adolescent. For example, it is common for parents to be involved with sports such as soccer, ice hockey or Little League. Parental pressure may foster attitudes that do not represent sound sportsmanship. Recently, there have been incidents where excessive parental involvement in sports has resulted in open physical fights between parents. It is crucial for any adult figure involved in such activities to set an appropriate tone. It is through this tone that the athlete will learn the importance of being a respectful player on the field and individual off the field. And since very few players will become an Olympic swimmer or major league baseball player, this character building is, by far, the most important result from participation. When such a tone is not communicated, teens may be turned off by sports and other group activities.

 Other students are involved in musical competitions during their adolescent years. Musicians often audition for special orchestras, music festivals or summer camps. At times, as in athletics and academics, music auditions may be connected to lucrative or prestigious scholarships. This competition may be intense and stressful for the adolescent. It is important for parents, music teachers and conductors to be supportive of the young musician who is under stress. Elders should understand that the pressure they believe the student faces may vary considerably from the pressure that the teen perceives.

While not all teenagers take part in beauty pageants, it is common for teens to compare their looks with that of their peers. Adolescents commonly elevate their own beauty by comparing themselves to their friends. This type of competition may present itself in many forms. Teens may feel the necessity to buy certain clothes or shoes. Or they may want to style their hair in a certain way. These attitudes are natural and are common in adolescent group dynamics.

However, competition over beauty becomes more problematic if it is impacting the teen’s health. Some teens develop physically earlier or later than others. And such comparisons may foster personal angst in addition to unwelcome comments from others including problematic self-perceptions. At its worst, beauty competition may contribute to the development of eating disorders in both women and men. For women, they are often concerned about weight, while men are more likely to be concerned about muscle development.

Another form of competition is competition among social groups. Teens often feel the need to be a member of a peer group or a clique. When these groups compare themselves to one another, competitive attitudes may emerge. Perhaps one clique is known for its interest in computers, another for academics and another in athletics. Some may perceive certain groups to be “cooler” than others. This social competition becomes particularly problematic if it is impeding the teen’s personal development. The teen may feel peer pressure to do certain activities that may include risky behaviors. In addition, the adolescent may feel as if he or she is losing himself or herself to the will of the group. At its worst this could lead to gang membership and participation in teen violence.

Lastly, familial competition is frequently part of a teen’s life. While these feelings are more pertinent to a teen with at least one sibling, an only child may perceive competition with cousins or close family friends. Familial competition results from a teen’s self-evaluation as compared to his or her evaluation of siblings. Does a sibling have more friends? Or does he have better grades? Is she a better athlete? Comparisons can be made in many different ways.

While there is no doubt that teens will compare themselves to their siblings, it is necessary for parents to treat each child individually. Strengths and weaknesses among children will vary, and in order to foster healthy self-image, parents must engage in this personalized approach to childrearing.

Samantha A. Goldstein M.D.
Department of Pediatrics
University of California, San Francisco