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Is it my fault?
Thoughts do not cause things
to happen. Remember you did nothing to
cause your parent's cancer.
How can I learn more about what
my parent is going through?
Don’t be afraid to ask
questions about your parent’s cancer.
No question is silly or dumb. Be careful
of seeking information on the internet.
Not all of it will be relevant to your
parent's illness. Some people might tell
you about someone they know who has cancer.
There are many types of cancer so listening
to what other tell you may be more confusing.
Talk to your parent(s) if you have concerns.
How do I find support?
Talk with someone you trust.
This might be someone in your family,
a friend, or someone at school. Don't
try to pretend that everything is OK.
Things will feel worse if you don’t
express your feelings.
What can I do to help?
When a parent is ill there can
be a lot of upheaval in the family. Certain
responsibilities and tasks might need
to be changed. Because you are an older
member of your family, you might be in
a position to help. Sit down and talk
about what you can do to help.
How can I reduce the stress that
I feel?
- It can be helpful to check-in with
your parent(s) about
what is happening. You can ask for
updates or talk
about how you or they are doing.
- Remember everyone in your family needs
to be flexible. There might be some
times where you need to spend time
with your friends instead of watching
younger siblings or helping out. Try
to keep a balance between helping
out, and having some space and time
to be a teenager.
- Make sure you are eating and sleeping
enough.
Getting some physical exercise every
day will help you manage any stress
you are feeling. Listening to music
or reading can help you relax or unwind.
- Your friends might not know what to
say. They may
wonder how to talk with you about
your parent’s
cancer. Tell your friends how they
can help support
you.
- While it might seem that alcohol or
other drugs will
help you cope, they really only cover
up the pain. If
you feel like you can't cope any other
way, please
reach out to a trusted adult and ask
for help. It will
make a difference in your life.
Do you have a list of websites,
books, and other resources on helping
kids cope?
Information Finder
on Helping Kids Cope
You may also be interested in
other topics:
Revised 2008
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